The Way I Used to Be: The TikTok sensation

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The things that she did and her way of coping was annoyingly painful. I wanted to grab her by the shoulders and tell her to speak up, tell them. But i just watched her suffer and hurt everyone around her until she was left all alone💔 wow. caelin was such a complex character and i loved every second of it. the author really did a great job writing about his denial and obliviousness to what his best friend did to eden. Authors, if you are a member of the Goodreads Author Program, you can edit information about your own books. Find out how in this guide. As part of my work with UN Women, I have started reading OUR SHARED SHELF IS CURRENTLY DORMANT AND NOT MANAGED BY EMMA AND HER TEAM.

Don’t be embarrassed,” she says with a laugh. “It’s fine, really, I promise.” She stands over me, looking taller than she ever has before, handing me my robe, oblivious of my Tuesday underwear crumpled at her feet. While there were a fair number of loose ends and some plot threads that could have been better developed (I don't need everything tied up, btw, some aspects were just crying out to be further explored) I appreciated that the story does not end with Eden being rescued by a boy--and she realizes she has to save herself. Few SA/A novels cover as wide a period of time as The Way I Used to Be does. Four years! Most novels will cover a few months of the aftermath or a year at the most. This extended timeline, however, goes to waste. Four years can span the time from crime to trial or from abuse to the beginning of healing, but Eden’s four years are one long downward spiral with significant events omitted. For instance, at some point between the end of her junior year and the start of her senior year, Eden begins referring to her parents by their names instead of Mom and Dad. Why? What did they do, if anything? What happened? There’s no worth in Smith’s premise of showing the long-term effects of rape if such turning-point moments in Eden’s life remain unwritten. Eden was always good at being good. Starting high school didn’t change who she was. But the night her brother’s best friend rapes her, Eden’s world capsizes.

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It felt like a very natural progression for me, moving from visual art to writing. I always wrote--a lot of j …more What great questions--thanks for asking! These characters were so real and this was such a great portrayal of the ugly side of being a victim after rape as a teen. I loved seeing the progression from year to year and how dark Eden was becoming (also, i didn't fail to notice the name significance here, also nice apple add in there).

Reading "The Way I Used to Be" reminds me a little of my experience reading a few of Ellen Hopkins books. No poetry here, but it's very raw and doesn't shy away from showing Eden's story in graphic detail. That means showing what happened to her during her rape and the aftermath in showing how it affects Eden's ability to relate with the people around her - from her family to friends to love interests. Suffice to say, Eden doesn't treat other people very well, let alone herself. It's a difficult spiral to watch; I'll admit there were times when I found it hard to watch Eden go to the point of no return with screwing up her relationships and trying everything she can to numb her respective pains - drugs, sex to offset her rape, pushing away all the people closest to her or even using other people as a means to end. Despite times when I wanted to throttle her or say "No, no, no!", I felt for her. Throughout the story I wanted so badly for her to overcome the spiral, even if there were moments where I felt numb by the holes she dug so deeply in her life. This is the only time i wish a book hadn't been written so vividly because it killed me inside to relive Eden's nightmare over and over. Mit der Anmeldung erklären Sie sich mit den Bestimmungen zur Missbrauchs- und Betrugsverhinderung gemäss unserer Datenschutzerklärung einverstanden. Anmelden What was once simple, is now complex. What Eden once loved—who she once loved—she now hates. What she thought she knew to be true, is now lies. Nothing makes sense anymore, and she knows she’s supposed to tell someone what happened but she can’t. So she buries it instead. And she buries the way she used to be. The pacing in some parts of the books was too fast. We were robbed for many of the important scenes! When and how she started calling her parents by their names not Mom and Dad.

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I had a hard time rating this book. I decided on three starts which still means I liked the book. I just really had a hard time with this one. I hate what Edy had to go through as a 14-year-old child. It was hard to read, it always is, it's hard to go through, it always is for the innocent one. I just really had a hard time with her not telling her mom right then, when she walked in the door that morning. So many of these kids are afraid to say anything, they don't think anyone will believe them. Especially if it's someone popular, someone in the family, a family friend, etc. But she had all of the evidence right there... right there..... I wanted to scream for her to call the cops and scream at her mom. Her parents were NOT very good to her, at least it seemed that way in the book. They weren't abusive, they just made Edy feel like her older brother was so much more important. It was the same way at school with Edy and bullies. Oh and how I loathe bullies too!

The Way I Used To Be is a fantastic portrayal of trauma. I cannot remember the last time I had such an intense, emotional response to a book, especially one that is not a part of a series that I had already been invested in. I wanted SO BADLY for Eden to tell someone what had happened to her, more than I think I have ever wanted a character to do ANYTHING. Eden’s story is raw, unflinching, emotional, powerful, and so so real. This book is not for the faint of heart – it is gritty and destructive, yet moving. It’s not often that I’m at a loss for words, because, well, I’m a writer, and usually I have too many words for any given situation. But after finishing this book, my heart was pounding and I couldn’t find words big enough to describe how brilliant, beautiful, and powerful it is. Those words just don’t seem to do it justice. None do. By the time I get out of the shower—still dirty, after scrubbing my body raw, thinking I could maybe wash the bruises off—there he is. Sitting at my kitchen table in my dining room with my brother, my father, my mother, sipping my orange juice from my glass—his mouth on a glass I would have to use someday. On a fork that would soon be undifferentiated from all the other forks. His fingerprints not only all over every inch of me, but all over everything: this house, my life, the world—infected with him. In the end the way he came again to save her 💔😖 i literally cried reading that. IT WAS TOO CUTE. Btw ik it would never NEVER happen in real life. 😪which made me cry even more

I wish we got more to that ending. Everything happened then the book simply ended. We didn't really get to see what happened after. How Eden heals and starts opening up to more people. We don't really get to see any reconciliation between Eden and her parents or Eden and her friends. I just wish we got to see what the ending has brought and how it shaped the main character's life anew. Even with those qualms, I still appreciated what this story had to offer. I still think this is a narrative worth perusing because it shows some hard fought battles and an eye to horrifying experiences that happen far more often than not with experiences with rape/SA. But I would also argue that it's important for people (teens and adults) to realize that survivors of rape are not all-encompassed by the terms "broken" or "damaged" - nor are their shaped by that experience alone. This is something that I feel many YA and NA books need to recognize and expand upon, and I feel like "The Way I Used to Be" could've had further expansion to make it hit home that much more. I really needed an emotional read like this one! THIS WAS THE BOOK I WAS LOOKING FOR TO MAKE ME CRY, SOB, GET ANGRY, AND THEN FEEL EMPTY AFTER READING!! Looking up at her, I feel so small. And Kevin’s voice moves like a tornado through my mind, whispering—his breath on my face—No one will ever believe you. You know that. No one. Not ever. And here is where I risk sounding insensitive. Because how dare I suggest that Eden goes through too much negative shit? Shouldn't this book show the horrible reality? Yes! Absolutely, yes! It should. But a series of terrible events does not make a good book.

I can hear him breathing on the other side of the door,breathing oddly,like,unevenly. But,no,it's not him just breathing,I realize slowly. He's crying. And I kneel there on the other side of the door that might as well be the other side of the galaxy,feeling so empty,so dead inside.” A single act can change your life forever. In Eden's case, the five minutes in which she was raped send her into a spiral of desperation and despair, so that there are times when she doesn't even recognize herself anymore.The Way I Used To Be is a debut novel that shares the story of Eden who struggles to find strength in the aftermath of an assault. Starting high school didn't change anything for Eden, she is still the good girl she ever was. But her world crashes down the night her brother's best friend rapes her in her own bedroom. Everything that was simle becomes complex. All that she loved, she now hates. Nothing makes sense anymore. She knows she should say something, but she can't, instead buring everything that has happened. And she buries the way she used to be. Also das Buch ist wirklich schwer zu verdauen, ich empfehle es aber jedem, weil es einfach als Aufklärung dienen kann. Overlay schließen Alle Bewertungen anzeigen The Way I Used To Be‘ ist ein unglaublich gutes Buch. Es lässt einen eintauchen in die Gedanken und Gefühle der Protagonistin, deren Leben sich nach einem tragischen Vorfall von Grund auf verändert. Es lässt einen verstehen, wieso sie sich so verhält und so reagiert und letztendlich hat es mir auch gezeigt, dass man auch in der Realität nie weiß, mit was manche Menschen zu kämpfen haben und dass es Gründe für bestimmte Verhaltensweisen gibt. Gerade bei so einem Thema, fragen sich viele bestimmt oft: „Warum hat sie (das Opfer) nichts gesagt?“ oder „Warum hat sie den Täter nicht angezeigt?“ The Way I Used To Be setzt genau diese Fragen um und zeigt, dass es nicht so einfach ist und dass es bei betroffenen Personen um viel mehr geht als das. Der innere Konflikt von Eden wurde perfekt dargestellt und man konnte stetig mitfühlen und bangen, dass sie sich jemandem öffnet. Die Möglichkeit schien teilweise zum Greifen nahe sich jemanden zu öffnen und gerade in diesen Momenten bangte ich mit ihr mit. This story also touches on other important aspects of sexual violence: how it affects more than the people directly involved, how it changes the way you relate to everyone around you, and how it perpetuates until it is stopped. And perhaps most importantly, stories like these are a reminder that we rarely know what's happened in other people's lives, and what has driven them to drink, to sleep around, or to betray friendships. I hope boys especially are encouraged to read this, and that the book helps to reshape the dialogue about trying to understand--and being compassionate about--those around us, even if and especially when they're behaving in ways that are hard to understand. (Eden endures a shit ton of slut-shaming, both casual and threatening.) Anger, acting out, promiscuity, and changes in behavior are often triggered by traumatic events, and seeing the warning signs and trying to act upon them might help someone in desperate need of kindness. The book follows Eden who’s a normal and a very good nerdy girl. She’s about to start high school and continue with her happy life but all that changes when her brother bestfriend rapes her and threatens her not to tell anyone because no one will believe her if she did.